side note :: on with the show

If this space didn’t have some archive of entries past, I couldn’t pinpoint the last time it was updated.
It’s been a long, long while.

And I miss it.
I miss a varied number of things, mostly to let go of this breathing underwater feeling.
The portrait challenge had a good run but I’ve skipped over so many weeks, it seems pointless to go on just to say I got to the end without really fully completing it. Maybe this speaks to the perfectionist streak in me but I can never do things half-heartedly and that is probably why so many projects are left open-ended, in progress.

It’s been crazy at times around here, others busily stagnant, with a routine that doesn’t add much and yet keeps your hands so full. I feel overflowing without being able to reach and hold the cup steady. Always a wave away from having said cup runneth over.

We have moved house, again. It was a sudden, heart-breaking, numb process but we came through and are slowly getting back on our feet – with our rules, our own set of expectations and aspirations.

Alice has stopped using her pacifier, changed from crib to a toddler bed (by her own accord) and is about to start – daycare! After over a year and a half, it is enough. Not only for my sanity but also – and mostly – hers. All kids should experience diverse interactions but this kid really needs them. She blossoms in social situations, loves meeting other kids, and at an age where development is galloping, it would be foolish and selfish to keep her to myself when it’s no longer serving a greater purpose, meaning neither of us is taking all the best that we can and deserve to get. That is why I am also eager for this change because it means free time to refocus on the goals and other changes this mom needs for both herself and this family.

I miss photographing.
I miss writing.
I miss dancing.
I miss creating.
I miss being more
instead of just
this.

Welcome back to a restart.

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37/52 :: 2016


“A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week – in 2016″

seen and inspired by jodi of practising simplicity

there could be many terms of endearment for you but flower girl gladly takes the crown.

here you are, paying close attention as your grandma tends to orchids in dire need of care. you admire the process, want to help and participate. you deeply dislike when i pluck a flower from its stem to hand it to you – you never accept it. and you have never plucked one either, much preferring to pet their petals and blow them kisses. but there have been many instances where you brought flowers (already plucked, left forgotten on the ground) to someone upon meeting them: family members, kids on the playground; and you can’t seem to understand why nobody does the same kindness, to plants or each other.

you have a brave yet sensitive heart.
i absolutely adore that about you, hope the world never lets you squander it too much or break it too hard.
i hope you never forget to cherish it good.

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36/52 :: 2016


“A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week – in 2016″

seen and inspired by jodi of practising simplicity

family holidays by the beach were enjoyed as slow as possible.
you are still dismissive of the sea and all its thundering sounds
but love being in the sand, lying in it, sprinkling toys (and food) with it…
such a versatile, fun thing to have around!

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34/52 :: 2016


“A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week – in 2016″

seen and inspired by jodi of practising simplicity

driving miss baby.
we found this oh-very-90s toy stroller that used to be my sister’s and we have passed it on to you.
you enjoy taking the baby on little walks around the garden, sure, but most of all,
you love collecting your precious stones and sticks on the seat.
i mean, seriously, what else should that moving nook be used for?

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33/52 :: 2016


“A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week – in 2016″

seen and inspired by jodi of practising simplicity

taking the expression “put yourself in someone else’s shoes” literally.
no pair of sneakers, boots, flip flops – from any family member – has been safe with her around,
the temptation to try them on is far too great.

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